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Choosing A New Path

#girlboss finding focus women empowerment work & life balance Jun 02, 2020

As I continue walking on my path of self-empowerment, I can say I've wandered through and tried many methods for attaining a healthy, balanced, empowered life. 

On my fridge, there's this poem I got years ago that reflects the sum of some of these experiences I've had, which I think many of us go through.

The poem is Chapters of My Life - by Porsche Nelson 20th-century American writer, and it goes:

Chapter 1: I walked on the sidewalk and fell into a deep hole. I couldn't get out and couldn't figure out why. It wasn't my fault. It took a good long time to get out.

Chapter 2: I walked on the sidewalk and fell onto the same hole again. I couldn't understand. It wasn't my fault. I really had to struggle to get out.

Chapter 3: I walk down the sidewalk and found the same hole again. This time I understood why and it was my fault. This time it was easier to get out.

Chapter 4: I walk down the sidewalk and saw the same hole again. I walked around it. I didn't fall into that hole.

Chapter 5: I chose another sidewalk.


Having been a female entrepreneur for over a decade now, it wasn't until I finally chose the last chapter in this poem, 'I chose another sidewalk' that led me to experience true health, balance, and self-empowerment finally. 

It also was, for me, the hardest, most challenging, to have decided to take a new way because this when all the fear showed up.  

When you are deciding to pursue that little nudge, your heart is leading you to take. Our minds will come up with some scary fear-based story to persuade you not to listen to your heart. 

Sure walking the old path, you know what's going to happen, you can predict it, it's easy, but honestly. Is it serving you at all in any positive way towards achieving a better, balanced, healthier, empowered life you're looking for? 

Seriously think about it. If your heart is nudging you to try a new path, it might be leading you to abundant life you seek.  

You do have the option not to take it, but do you want to stay in the same old rut and misery? 

Or take a chance towards going into a new direction that could lead you to accomplishing something amazing?

One way to help you decide if any of those fear-based thoughts you have when you consider taking that new path  are valid, is to answer the following five questions:


Step #1 - What are you fearing? 

  • Write a list of all the fearful things you think could happen if you decide to take this new path. 
    • Example: It won't work, you'll make no money, you'll have to move back in with your family, people may laugh at you, etc.


Step #2 - How valid is the fear?

  • After you've written all the possible fearful results down, review your list, and next to each one write down a scale of 1 to 10.  One would be yeah that is not likely, five would be maybe, and ten would be 100% likely it will happen. 
    • Example: You put a 8 next to the statement 'You'll make no money.'


Step #3 - How do you know this will happen? 

  • For anything you scaled seven and above, write the reason why you know this will happen. If you don't have hard proof that what you wrote is likely to happen, then downgrade it below a five. 
    • Example: Using the example above, you put an eight next to 'you'll make no money' because you think this will likely happen.  You haven't taken this new path yet, so you have no proof that it is going to happen. So this seven would now turn into a five


Step #4 - What is the positive that will happen?

  • Now write out all the positive things which will happen if you achieve taking this new path and rate these from a scale of 1 to 10. One here would be not excited, five happy, to ten Super Excited.  
  • Write in detail how you will feel from the positive thing happening. Get as detailed as positive here.   
    • Example: You would get to make your own hours = 10, you would get to do something fun = 10, etc.


Step #5 - Compare Your Results?

  • Now compare the results of what you wrote on the fear the could happen and what positive results could happen too.  
  • Do you see more positive end results than negative? 


Use the above questions to help you determine if your mind is creating a fear-based story that stopping your success. Only your heart knows if this new path is for you, use these answers to help you determine if your mind is getting in the way of you taking that new road to an empowered Girl Boss future. 




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